Come In

If you're a dreamer, come in,
If you're a dreamer, a wisher, a liar,
A hope-er, and pray-er, a magic bean buyer...
If you're a pretender, come sit by my fire,
For we have some flax-golden tales to spin,
Come in!
Come in!

It seems like, on a daily basis, I wish that I was younger again. When life was so much simpler. When all I had to worry about was being on time to school at 7 or 8 in the morning. Or when math class was the thing that I worried about the most. When I was going to get to hang out with my friends again. Getting my chores done. Needing to be home quickly after school so I could get back to recording my favorite songs off of the radio onto a tape.

Seriously, one of my favorite quotes of all time is from Grey's Anatomy. 

"We're adults. When did that happen? And how do we make it stop?"

For serious though. You wanna know the kind of stuff I have to worry about now that I'm an "adult"?
Making it to work at 11 pm.
Worrying about getting a hard stick ALL day.
Getting home safely after a graveyard shift because I can barely keep my eyes open.
How do I make it through another day at work.
What do I want to be when I grow up because I'm getting older and I'm still not even close to where I need to be and I still and flip flopping between professions because I can't make up my mind and I don't want to be stuck in a job that I hate for the rest of my life.
How do I go back to school while working graveyard shifts.
How do I function on a normal basis.
All my friends are getting married and I haven't even been on a date since Sr year. Is something wrong with me.
My brother is definitely getting married before me.
I don't have any friends that aren't A. Married, B. On missions, C. Will go out of their way to hang out with me. Is something wrong with me?
I need a haircut.
Money.
I sit by myself at church when I get the chance to go. Because I no longer have any friends in my ward.

I could go on.

And you know what. I look at all of that...and I realize how insignificant all of those things are. Because of this.

I have a family that truly loves me. That helps me get through day to day life. That is in a place to help me when I say, "I just can't take this anymore!" and will help me get through life until I can find another job.
I have food in my fridge.
I have a closet jam packed full of clothes and shoes.
I have a car that is paid off, that runs well, and isn't a p.o.s.
I have an awesome phone and brand spankin new laptop (because my other one died.)
I am blessed with a job. Even though it isn't exactly my favorite thing ever.
I live in a free country where, as a woman, I can vote.
I have friends that I know love me even when they blow me off time and time again or choose their husbands over me. Which I totally understand.
My dad has a great job that lets us live a comfortable life.
I am able to go to a church of my choosing.
I'm freakin awesome.
With an awesome sense of humor. This is proof.

And so I stuff my feelings back into their box because I'm being selfish. 
I crank up my new Taylor Swift and Carrie Underwood albums.
I make crazy awesome food to try and fend of the nesting urges.
I continue to love my friends from a distance.

And I read and re-read these words. Because Shel Silverstein knew what was up.

"Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impssibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me... Anything can happen, child. Anything can be."

.ashley.

Source: jsttrstgodgrl.tumblr.com via Ashley on Pinterest