There's a lady in my mom's ward that is a Nursing professor at UVU that had told my mom...to tell me...to not take Anatomy from UVU. I had heard from multiple sources the same thing, but coming straight from a professor, I figured that was a sign that I should take heed.
So I applied to..................BYU. UGH. Don't worry. It was only night classes. If you want to know my feelings about BYU, that is another discussion that I don't want to post publicly. Let's just leave it at...I never thought I would end up willingly going there. Ever. But lo and behold, the Lord laughed in my face and pointed to the Y on the mountain.
Now I'm pretty familiar with the campus, shockingly. I did do 4 years of EFY. "I got dragged all over those hills, and let me tell you pal, I didn't hear any singing." Actually...there was lots of singing. It was EFY.
So finding the bookstore, piece of cake. Getting my I.D., even easier.
Finding class? Adventurous. But manageable. Just remember. I'm a winner.
So here's where the plot thickens. Because of my work schedule, the only time I could take lecture was on Thursday nights. And Anatomy, as it turns out, requires a 1.0 lab with it. (HA! grumble mumble. 1 measly credit...) Also on Thursday nights...just....later.
"Nice," Ashley thought. "I can go to class, have an hour break, do the 2 hour lab...and be good for the week (at least on campus)."
This is the part where Heavenly Father starts laughing. Again. He has a great sense of humor that man. It's really quite amusing.
That first day in class they laid out how much time, just for that class, we were going to have to commit to every week to get a good grade. They offered lecture reviews with the TA's, on campus, which they said we should go to at least 2 of a week. Also, we should be in a study group and meet once or twice a week. And outside of our lab time, we had 4 hours of open lab time we could go and study, but really we should try and get more than that if we could. Keep in mind, I live in Lehi. And work in Riverton. YIKES. I had no idea what I was walking into.
That was just lecture. Lab was next.
That was a smack in the face like I've never experienced before. The brain too. They threw, oh idk, 100+ terms at us that first night. Pleasant. Grand. I left lab with my ears bleeding (not really). I was very much overwhelmed.
And it just kept going from there. No let up. I knew I HAD to do whatever I could to get an A in the class. So I started going to the lecture reviews like they recommended. I went to open lab whenever I could. And all I got was....frustrated. I didn't have a smart way of studying yet. Although, I did have these sweet flashcards from Jenny.
So my coloring skills were thriving.
I didn't know how the Professor tested yet. I didn't know what I was doing, but I was doing. I was doing okay on my lab quizzes, but feeling crazy overwhelmed every time I learned and left lab the next week.
I think the second week in I sent a message to Jeannie telling her I needed some help with Anatomy. And it was help like, "Hey, if you remember, can you send me an encouraging text or something funny around the hours of 8-10 on Thursday nights? That would be great..." And she took to that like bees to honey. For the next month or so I would walk out of lab with not one, but 5 or 6 text and pictures of f.r.i.e.n.d.s. quotes and and hilarious meme's that would help me forget, even for a moment, what my mind had just been crammed with.
Midterms come. Because of the way things happen to fall for this class, our Lecture and Lab test ends up being on the same week. Gross. I never want to do that again. Stressful is an understatement. Because I was taking the lecture midterm first, I studied for that one more than the lab. Which I think was okay. I don't know if at that point in the semester I would have done any better on lab anyway.
Again, my artistic skills put to good use.
The lecture test was open all week. I took that Monday off from work to study all day, Tuesday to prep a little more, and Wednesday to take the test. Wednesdays are also my temple day. I always go right after work. Usually I can get in and out in about 30 mins during the school year. Perfect timing for pretest jitters. So I walk in, and the perfect grey haired temple workers (who call me the vampire and know me on first name basis by now) ask me if I have time to do 100 names. *Strike up internal battle.* On one hand--I have to go take my test!! I don't have time for this! On the other hand--How do I NOT have time for this?
So I agreed to do it. And guess how many questions my lecture test was? 100. Sneaky sneaky. Personally, I thought of every one that I did as a personal guardian angel for every question. I don't think I got through all 100 of them though, because I pulled a 92% on my test. After which I walked out of the testing center and called my mom crying, telling her my score and about how amazing Heavenly Father is. Because he IS!
Throughout the semester, to that point, I had been relying on Heavenly Father to a certain extent. I was doing what I could to not drown, but I wasn't putting everything in His hands. That was an AHA! moment for me. A derp if you will. Did the workload get easier? Absatutely not. Did I still get frustrated? You bet your bottom dollar. But I was able to see a bigger picture.
The next couple labs we learned about the brain, the heart, the respiratory system. These things were all fascinating to me. I found I wasn't overwhelmed because somehow, these things were beautiful and intriguing. Muscles and bones just don't do it for me. I excelled especially at brain and respiratory. At open lab, I had multiple people ask me if I was a T.A. because I was able to explain things to other people and quiz them instead of my usual floundering.
Lecture Midterm 2 comes along. I walk in and out of it feeling okay. I pull an 87%....and am not happy with it....because I'm Hermione. I'm used to getting A's. And when I don't...I'm visibly upset. Which is ridiculous.
Because I talk about it at work so much, my coworkers asked me about how my test went the next day...and were thrilled that I got such a good score on such a hard test. See, they have perspective. They help keep me in check. And...they believe in me. I have never heard so many people this semester tell me that they believe in me. That they know I can do it. And that is something that still floors me.
Finals.
Keep in mind, this whole time I'm putting in 12+ hours a week outside of class going to lecture reviews, open lab, and sometimes a study group.
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| Study group proof. Blood types made from candy. I'm a genius! |
Now add another, oh, 8 hours at least. I was gonna get that A or die trying.
The week after Thanksgiving I put in 13 hours in Open Lab. And the week of Lab Finals, another 8. My lab midterm I got a 68/100 and was determined to not get another score like that. The last 3 hours of Open Lab I remember just walking aimlessly around to the different tables not knowing what to study...because I had already studied everything multiple times. I didn't know what else I really needed to focus on.
Our final Lecture was the day of our Lab Final. It was also the lecture about Pregnancy and Childbirth and where our professor, Dr. Wisco, gave his closing remarks for the semester. He began his closing remarks with showing us the picture he started the semester with.
We had talked about the gap between Adam and God and who was putting forth more effort to close that gap.
He then gave us a few words that were very powerful to me. And couldn't have been more clear as to why he does what he does.
Here is part of it. (With a picture of our final group project btw)
THAT is why I took Anatomy from BYU. Not because I was avoiding a bad situation at another school. But because I was supposed to take this class from a professor that truly cares about what he's teaching. From someone that wants us to be able to more fully understand that we are children of God, and we need to treat ourselves and others as such.
................
An hour later I walked into my Lab Final with a stomach full of Zupas Salad and Sobe Lifewater. I couldn't have been more ready if I wanted. And I killed it. 88% and he curved it 10 points. BOOM! 98%. That's what's up.
From that point on it was all study for Lecture Final. I had been kinda studying before, but at that point I could forget all about lab and finally focus. And focus I did. I studied Friday night, all Saturday, and all Monday. Monday night, I had run out of an effective way to study, so I recruited Dad to help me. Hearing him try and pronounce some of the terms was hilarious, but I can guarantee him helping me study helped me pull off the 91% that I earned on that test the next day.
What a great person.
Also, the whole semester, my Mom had been making me lunches and food to take with me to class so that I wouldn't starve. And every time before or after a test, she would tell me how Dad, her and Kyle had been praying for me.
I'm telling you. People really took care of me. It's astonishing the amount of love others have for me.
So here are some things I have learned this semester.
1. Read my scriptures. No matter how late I get home. No matter how tired I am. Do it.
2. Pray to Father. No matter how late I get home. No matter how tired I am. Do it.
3. I am no longer embarrassed or afraid to talk about ANYTHING related to the human body. Bring it.
4. Always, always, always do temple work. It blesses those on the other side, but it probably blesses you more. Even if you can't see immediate blessings.
5. I have an inordinate amount of people that love me. Some of whom, I didn't know did. Or I didn't know to what extent. And I'm so glad my trials could bring that out.
6. Spraying people in the face with cadaver spray isn't a nice thing to do, even if it was on accident...twice.
7. I'm missing a muscle in my forearm. Palmaris Longus in case you were curious.
While I learned a lot academically this semester, I think I learned more spiritually. I learned that there is no way...NO FREAKING WAY...that there isn't a higher power that made our bodies. There is no way a big bang can explain the beautiful way a podocyte cell lays and fits over a glomerulus just right so that the kidney can filter our blood.
Nope. That can't be explained away by reasoning. And I'm so glad I was able to sit in a class, or a T.A. lecture review, where they could say, "This picture is my favorite in the whole manual. Isn't Heavenly Father amazing. Look how intricate and exact this is!" How we could get excited about being nerdy AND gospely.
And if you've somehow gotten to the end of my novel, here's this last thought.
When you take all the skin and fat and hair away....besides size....there are only two variations. Male or Female. We are all the same on the inside. I can verify that firsthand. But the amazing thing about us, as children of our Heavenly Father, is that we aren't carbon copies once we put ON the skin, the fat, the hair. All of which provides protection--first and foremost. But it also provides us with our uniqueness and part of our personalities.
I have never been, and will never be, a swimsuit model or someone that can do a backflip on dry ground. I'm just not built like that. But I can out swim most of my friends and do a backflip off a low dive. And here is the most important thing this class has taught me. Which is to understand how my body works, and to love myself even more. I am beautiful, no matter what size. I can rock jeans, a concert tee, and curls just as well as the next girl.
My Creator DOES NOT make mistakes. And fortunately for you, our Creator is the same person.
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